Here’s my first Shine Parenting Guru post. This month, we were asked to write about a moment over the last year that we are genuinely thankful for. Trying to come up with just one was a challenge, but here’s what I chose to write about. A special thanks to the friends who inspired me (and Big)!
Recently Big and I were discussing his upcoming birthday party. Since his birthday isn’t until March, this chat may seem premature. But when you’re 4, time is measured in finger paint projects and birthday parties, so it was really quite natural. While we were chatting, I was more than a little surprised when Big announced he didn’t want to invite any friends to his party. I know he leans toward the shy end of the spectrum, but he has some buddies he truly adores and I just didn’t get it.
I felt a manic mommy moment coming on. It was time to save my little boy from himself again… I was prepared to tell him how friends are the people that make life’s celebrations special. I was ready to ask him how he’d feel if his friends had a party and didn’t invite him. I was even willing to point out all the fun that can be had by a group of preschoolers all hopped up on sugar.
But as I started in, “What about so and so…” and went down the list of his friends he can’t seem to get enough of, he said (in the sweetest of exasperated tones), “Well, of course they’re invited, Mom. They’re family.”
My shoulders relaxed and my eyes welled up. There was no need for panic, after all. Just gratitude.
Once again, Big put into simple words a feeling that I am blessed with every day. Not only do we have fun, supportive, loving relatives on our side, our family also includes some of the most wonderful friends we could ask for. And the best part is, the kids love each other as much as the adults do.
These are friends who are there to toast the smallest of triumphs at a moment’s notice (like the fact that we made it to Friday afternoon). And who show up with a homemade dinner when it’s been a rocky few days (or weeks). Friends who don’t care when you haven’t done your breakfast dishes (from last Tuesday). And friends who know just how to make you laugh (especially at yourself).
Some of these friends have known us longer than we’ve really even known ourselves. And others are new to our lives, but it feels like we’ve been friends forever. Each of them holds a special place in our lives, even if they don’t have a spot on our family tree.
So this season as I think about all the things I’m thankful for—and the list is long—our extended family is right there at the top. And knowing that Big feels that same love, well, that’s just about as good as it gets.
I would be oh-so thankful (as would others, I’m sure), if you’d share a moment you’re grateful for this year. Even if you’ve never commented, please don’t be shy!
Anne says
November 10, 2010 at 2:51 pmI love this! I feel the same way as Big about my friends and my kids friends. As my girls get older, their friends are becoming more and more a part of their lives and it’s a great thing to see those connections grow so strong. It’s all good until they all start talking about religion…but that’s a whole new subject for your blog post.
Amy says
November 10, 2010 at 2:55 pmI love sharing our stories after the weekends of all the fun we’ve had with our friends. We are both so lucky…and I’m lucky to have you as a friend too!
Amy N says
November 10, 2010 at 4:25 pmThis may sound generic but I am thankful for my community I live in. This includes obviously my great friends who also happen to be my neighbors, my neighborhood, the local school and wonderful parents who make up a huge part of why our school provides so much for our children. With my son entering kindergarten this year I was so happy he was starting the year already knowing kids (from preschool and the neighborhood) what a great comfort to him and myself. After starting the school year (here is where the community comes into play) seeing the dedication of parents volunteering time, money, support in any way to make the school my child attends is WONDERFUL! I am thankful to live in a community like this. Then to come home and be surrounded by our friends that are like family as BIG says is a blessing. I couldn’t be more grateful for my dear friends and the community around me. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else!
Amy says
November 10, 2010 at 8:56 pmI think a huge part of getting a lot from a community is putting your heart into it. And you’ve put a ton into your neighborhood, family, friendships and schools, so you certainly deserve the rewards you’ve reaped!
Mary says
November 10, 2010 at 5:29 pmBeautiful post, Amy, and so true! As I get “older,” I am so thankful for the beautiful friends that I share my journey with. It is truly a blessing, what I believe life is all about really, to be able to share love and life with wonderful people, and now as I watch my children sharing their lives with my friends’ children, it’s fantastic. I cherish the friendships that I have with women that I knew as a girl, and I love watching these amazing women as mothers, and seeing my own children play with their children- what a gift!
What I am thankful for on a daily basis is family, family, and family. I’m so, so thankful for my husband. That I get to share our jokes, joys, and fun times together. I’m beyond thankful for my children. I think of them as my “dreams come true” because I always dreamed of becoming a mother, and I love all the little moments we share each day. I’m so thankful for my parents and that I get to spend time with them, and my children love them and have them in their lives. I love my sister and brother, and love being with their amazing families. And, of course, I love all the dear friends that I consider sisters, and the joy of sharing our wonderful family times together. Thank God for family! It is truly the greatest blessing:)
Amy says
November 10, 2010 at 9:00 pmIt’s so true that each person in our families impact us in wonderful, unique ways…and for that we should be grateful each and every day!
Linda S. says
November 10, 2010 at 7:16 pmMy eyes welled up after reading this too! How insightful Big is….and because you’ve taught him the true definition of family. With a very small family ourselves, our kids grew up with our friends’ kids, who call themselves cousins and their parents refer to themselves as aunts and uncles. Blood relation is a non-issue. And with genetics not getting in the way, neither do the commonalities that often surface negatively. While I love my immediate family, I am also thankful for so many friends that I refer to as “family”, with whom I end each conversation with “Love you”. And with some challenges our immediate family is currently facing, their love is even more wonderful. Thank you, Amy, for the reminder to reflect on our gratitude!
Amy says
November 10, 2010 at 9:03 pmJust like Amy, I know that the love and friendship you’ve felt from others has been returned by you ten-fold!
Julie says
November 10, 2010 at 9:08 pmI posted mine today to, I’m thankful for the growing relationship I have with my children.
But I’m also thankful for the big things. Like health. My local community is being hit with a lot of health-scares right now and it really puts you in your place, reminding you just how precious your time with your loved ones is.
I love what your Big told you about his family. Absolutely love that. How fortunate you are to have such a wonderful group of friends.
Amy says
November 11, 2010 at 10:28 amThanks, Julie. I look forward to reading yours as well. Here’s to a season filled with fun with your kids and to your family’s continued health!
Kate says
November 11, 2010 at 5:00 amLove this post! It’s so easy to forget what we are blessed with. Nice to take time to recognize and be thankful. Here’s my short list:
three healthy, happy, beautiful children
a husband who works effortlessly to provide for this family
that we still have grandmas & grandpas on both sides
our neighbors
frozen peas and fish sticks on nights when I don’t want to cook
facebook to keep me plugged in from across the world
our nanny
moments I am thankful for:
the belly laughs and giggles
when making hot chocolate and popcorn can solve anything
blowing kisses to my son before he falls asleep and hearing him laugh as i walk out the door
Listening to my four year old begin to ask all the hard questions about life, death, babies, place and time.
Having this moment to myself to sit and think about all that I am thankful for!
Amy says
November 11, 2010 at 10:30 amI LOVE your list…and no doubt it could go on and on. I love keeping up with your family from afar and hope that you find many more reasons to be thankful on your latest adventure!
Ellen Weir Casey says
November 11, 2010 at 12:48 pmAmy, I am thankful for that precious photo of the little three holding hands! And, as always, I am so thankful for my dear, dear friend, Dana, who calls right when I am not sure I can make it. I hear her voice in your words.
XO
Amy says
November 11, 2010 at 10:31 pmThanks so much, Ellen. I know my mom is grateful for you too!
PS- Isn’t that picture adorable? It’s Big with two of his best friends a couple years ago…they still love to walk hand in hand today!