9 Things I Learned This Week, Vol 22

Yeah, 9 is kind of a random number. But when you lie in bed all day, you have more time to ponder these things and 5 just isn’t enough.

Lesson #1: This may be the hardest my stomach ever is, so I’m going to enjoy my contractions while I can. Then again, if contractions are like sit ups, I’m coming out of this pregnancy with a 6-pack.

Lesson #2: If you happen across a Zac Effron High School Musical “Barbie” in a box of hand-me-down baby clothes from your niece, hide it before your kids find it. Or learn to love the shirtless, singing wonder. (But not as much as your 2-year old who wants to sleep with it.)

Lesson #3: Since the car is really the only place I listen to the radio, I’m falling behind on pop culture. Big turned the radio on in his room the other day and started singing a new Avril Lavigne song I’d never even heard. (He also sang along to “Have a good night’s sleep on us…Mattress Discounters!”, so maybe we listen to the radio too much in the car.)

Lesson #4: When you hear your early riser playing for 45 minutes before calling you to get up, it may not be the blessing you thought it was. Especially if you’re the stuffed animal whose 30-something-year-old nose is in a pile of 100 black threads in the middle of the crib. At least Snoopy doesn’t have to smell Little’s dirty diapers any more.

Lesson #5: While it’s great to have a child who eats well and takes his time, 1-1/2 hour dinners can be excruciating…even from the couch. Next week we’re going to have to start dinner at 4pm.

Lesson #6: The combination of Little’s sassy, “Buh-bye, baby!” every time he leaves the house and his throwing the I’m a Big Brother book at the ground every time I suggest reading it makes me think he may not be as excited about this baby as the rest of us.

Lesson #7: I’ll admit it, I’m a bit controlling when it comes to the boys. (Ok, not just when it comes to the boys.) Now that I can’t be as “involved”, they’re suddenly more “creative”. The other day they went out back to play and came back in the house naked. When Little announced he had to go potty, instead of running to the bathroom, he ran back out to the yard. Guess he’s been hearing about the naked potty training method at the playground and wanted to try it out on his own. (Already a middle child.) Then this morning, the boys came running out of Big’s room saying they’d made a jumpy house. They moved furniture, got the (very) heavy mattress off the bed and onto the floor where they were jumping their hearts out. I’m trying to find the humor in these little escapades. Trying. (While writing this Little came in covered in head-to-toe stamps. A few minutes later he came in to tell me he had failed trying to change his own dirty diaper…I’ll spare you the details.)

Lesson #8: When your little boys decide they want to play hair dresser, the goal isn’t to make you look like a princess, but a pirate. (With heavily moisturized cheeks.)

Lesson #9: You can’t do too many egg hunts in one day. (With the same eggs, in the same yard.)

I hope you and your family enjoyed celebrating Easter or Passover, and each other this week. As always, I’d love to hear about your adventures and mishaps (might as well, laugh, right?).