I know, Mondays can be tough. So why not start out the week with a laugh or two—at my expense, of course. You’re welcome.
Lesson #1: There seems to be a common misconception that because I tend to be good at writing about being a mom, that I must be good at actually being a mom. But I’ll be the first to acknowledge that passion and talent are two very different things (just watch my high school dance videos).
Lesson #2: While I never got the concept of co-sleeping with my first two kids, with Pink I’ve realized that if you put the emphasis on the “sleeping”, not the “co”, it makes a whole lot of sense. Which leads me to…
Lesson #3: You know you’re up early when the only bird you hear is an owl.
Lesson #4: While to adults, a penny may not seem like much, to a child it’s a magical wish. And if you try to sell a dime as an extra-special wish, don’t be surprised if your entrepreneurial kid catches on to its value and decides to pocket it instead.
Lesson #5: It takes me 16 songs to get the kids ready to go to my parents’ house for the day. 16 songs! When Big pointed this out, he didn’t seem to realize that I, too, had to listen to the Chipmunks that whole time and did everything in my power (including skipping a shower) to speed up the process.
Lesson #6: You know how people say infant poop doesn’t stink? Not true. So. Not. True.
Lesson #7: Just as sure as a watched pot never boils, an unwatched tub overflows.
Lesson #8: Speed eating contests should have a “mom” category. I’m pretty confident I could blow the doors off the average teenaged boy.
Lesson #9: You can crown yourself Mother of the Year when your kid begs for a lima bean breakfast, and fall from grace the very same afternoon when he decides to pants you in the tux rental shop. (And I’m pretty sure the guys in said tux rental shop would also agree with Lesson #6.)
Lesson #10: It takes 4 packs of gum, 2 packs of M&Ms and 1 promise to fill a kid’s gem jar to get two hesitant little ring bearers to walk down the aisle. And it’s worth every smack, stain and clink. (Congrats to the beautiful couple, Carolline and Joe! More to come on that…)
Here’s to a passion-filled week. And, hey, if you can muster up a bit of grace, more power to you!