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Hope Santa Checks Twice

Hope Santa Checks Twice

December 14, 2011 by Amy, Using Our Words 8 Comments

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You better watch out.

You better not cry.

Better not pout.

I’m telling you why. Santa Claus is coming to town.

Oh yeah? I’d “better not”, huh? Sounds a little like a dare to me. Heck, I’ve been nice all year. Now that you mention it, I’m due for a little naughty. It’s not easy controlling all those impulses, you know. But I do. For the most part. Well, I did. Until now. But it’s not my fault. You dared me. You threatened no presents. Said you’d tell that creepy plastic elf who keeps forgetting to move around the house. I’m not buying it. So I’m going all out. All out crr-azzzy. But don’t blame me, you asked for it.

So I may be a tiny bit off, but I’m close. Those are the thoughts going through my kids’ heads at this very moment. How do I know? I spent the day with them. A day which included a singing, dancing show turned screaming, kicking fit in the middle of an otherwise silent (yet crowded) post office. And I spent last Christmas season with them too. (But I was smart enough to avoid the post office, I guess.)

Yes, this is the time of year when everyone is supposed to be jolly—on our best behavior. But the pressure. Is. Just. Too. Much.

And I get it. Because I’m not much better. Today I didn’t watch out. I cried. I pouted. I shouted. I sassed back. I snuck a piece of candy (or two). Drank a glass of wine (or two). I did not make Santa proud. Assuming he made his lists tonight, I know which one I’m on.

So, Santa, bring me coal if you must. Rumor has it, under tremendous force, a piece of coal becomes a diamond. And this season’s packed with enough pressure to make me one sparkly lady.

Do you and your family crack under the holiday pressure or glow in the beauty of the season?

 

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Filed Under: featured, Mom Musings Tagged With: christmas, failure, naughty, pressure, Santa

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Comments

  1. OpinionsToGo says

    December 15, 2011 at 1:27 pm

    I hear ya sista! All of this “Imposed Jocularity” is too, too much. We are all dancing as fast as we can.
    So glad that you haven’t lost your sense of humor and one more good thing, you get to vent RIGHT HERE!

    Reply
    • Amy, Using Our Words says

      December 15, 2011 at 3:41 pm

      Dance and vent on!

      Reply
  2. Jodie Hoffman says

    December 15, 2011 at 1:37 pm

    we are a mess over here…. we’re throwing toys, we’re harassing siblings, we’re not going to sleep, we’re having fits, and we don’t give a sh*t about the “gem jar” anymore….
    Oh and then… I went to bed early last night to try and fend off a cold and Matt put the plastic elf within reach this morning and seamus touched him with a Humongosour action figure so Finn nearly lost it…. “THE MAGIC’S GONE!!! IT’S GONE!!!!!!” Maybe we just need to take a time out and re-start by just being REALLY naughty…. ice cream sundaes for lunch anyone? Then we’ll be nice from then on… right?!

    Reply
    • Amy, Using Our Words says

      December 15, 2011 at 3:42 pm

      I like this theory and just might try it. Snack time!

      Reply
  3. Melinda Gurman says

    December 15, 2011 at 9:53 pm

    I promise to send Santa your way if he comes to my house by mistake! While we’re waiting to light our candles it is a holy and silent night in our house. My college freshman is home and we’re all together again!

    Reply
    • Amy, Using Our Words says

      December 18, 2011 at 7:42 pm

      How lovely! I hope you are all enjoying your time together.

      Reply
  4. Brittany says

    December 16, 2011 at 9:45 am

    Were in full on naughty mode in our house. My Big was sent home from school yesterday on bad behavior, my little won’t pee in the potty EVER and I’m losing my mind by taking in way too much holiday obligations. This weekend is all about resetting and remembering what this freaking season is all about. Not sure if Santa is forgiving but I sure hope he has a wicked sense of humor :).hang in there and remember love is what it’s all about. 🙂

    Reply
    • Amy, Using Our Words says

      December 18, 2011 at 7:43 pm

      I love a jolly man with a wicked sense of humor. Love, love, love!

      Reply

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I’m Amy, the girl next door. I’m your average obsessive mom/ happy wife/ freelance copywriter/ slice-of-life blogger/ social media addict/ chocolate lovin’ wino. Read More…

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