As if my last post didn’t have you convinced, here’s further proof that I’m just a little bit crazy.
Lesson #1: There’s a little more Claire Dunphy in me than I care to admit. Big had his first school project—to make a creative display of 100 of his favorite things—which really ended up being our school project. Come egg drop time, someone’s gonna have to lock me up.
Lesson #2: Sometimes instead of looking for a logical consequence for upsetting behavior, you just have to look for the logical explanation. This week I realized that Little’s non-stop morning tears aren’t about his clothes or breakfast, but about saying goodbye to his best friend, Big, for the day.
Lesson #3: When you’re three, going for a quick bike ride is about a ten step process. Hop in bed with your blankie. Ask for a snack. Insist on a wardrobe change. Read a book. (Baby sister’s diaper change.) Ask for another snack. Throw a temper tantrum about your shoes hurting. Throw a temper tantrum about your helmet hurting. Ride until you’re at the furthest point from home and then decide that you’re too exhausted to go any further. Watch mom have a temper tantrum. And, eventually, ride home.
Lesson #4: While getting dressed with the door open may be the prudent thing to do to ensure you can keep an eye on the kids, it becomes a bit of a risk when they’re playing “I Spy” at the breakfast table. Before you know it, the “peach” item they’re searching for is your “boobie pads”.
Lesson #5: Two little boys can empty a box of crackers and fill a laundry basket in a 24-hour period.
Lesson #6: No matter how brilliant you think your own kid is, there will always be someone to humble you. While working in Big’s kindergarten class the other day, I reminded a little girl to write her name on her paper. And she did. In cursive.
Lesson #7: Some boys play superheroes. Some play fireman. Mine plays Food Network. The other night I found Big re-plating his Chinese takeout and offering much more appealing looking items to his brother.
Lesson #8: Certain things should not be done while wearing a baby in a carrier. Trimming your bangs. Showering. Blow drying your hair. Hanging streamers. Moving the car out of the driveway. I know because I considered all and attempted a few recently.
Lesson #9: Sometimes a title is not reflective of your qualifications. While I’m thrilled to be returning as a Yahoo! Shine Parenting Guru this year (and the company just keeps getting better!), I’m thinking they should consider calling me Bossy Mom Who’s Learned Everything She Knows From Her Own (Frequent) Mistakes and Failures. (I hope you’ll read my latest, comment and share…over here.)
Lesson #10: I did something to anger the nap gods. In a major way.
I’m afraid I’m too tired to come up with something witty here. I’m blaming #10. That and the kid in my lap trying to type (luckily it’s the one who can’t read this). Good night, sleep tight.