10 Things I Learned This Week, Vol 70

Birthdays—and a blogiversary—were celebrated, camp—and camping—were conquered, and wardrobes—yes, multiple—disappointed. It was a big week around here and I really and truly appreciate you all being here for the ups and downs.

Lesson #1: After a whole lot of family togetherness during the first 3 weeks of summer vacation, Big going to sports camp this week was a lifesaver. And I’m pretty sure I’m not using that term figuratively.

Lesson #2: Carpooling to camp can be dangerous. Booster seat craziness forces you to go back into the third row of the minivan to see what’s collected back there over the past year. (Though today this proved to be the more pleasant of the two trips I took back there.)

Lesson #3: I really, really need to fire my stylist. One afternoon this week, I had the pleasure of running into and chatting with some old friends I hadn’t seen in years. (You know, back when I slept more, ate less and had lip gloss in my purse instead of diaper cream.) Moments after we parted ways, I was strapping Little into his car seat when he asked, “Mommy, why are you still wearing your pajamas?”

Lesson #4: Pink needs to fire her stylist too. I should have known the morning Little came in her room and said she looked “handsome” (as opposed to the usual “beautiful”) that people would comment on my cute baby boy at the park.

Lesson #5: A container full of lady bugs being set free at the park can make a kid’s day (well, my bug-loving kid’s, at least). A couple of those lady bugs stowing away in the diaper bag and showing up at your house can make his week.

Lesson #6: Only another mother of three would text you before 7am to wish you a happy birthday. And only this mother would wonder why she’d been up for so long before hearing from someone.

Lesson #7: You know your life has changed dramatically in the last 10 years when your former boss reaches out to you to say that he thinks your Twitter account may have been hacked. But, after explaining that your life is a little less Junior Copywriter and a little more Desperate Housewives now, he simply replies, “Ah, that explains it.”

Lesson #8: One girl’s underwear is another girl’s bling.

Lesson #9: For the remainder of vacation, I plan to continue partnering with Safeway, Target, and Costco to offer complimentary birth control to bored teenagers forced to shop with their parents.

Lesson #10: After a boys’ camping weekend (up a windy road), nothing says ‘we missed you’ like bags of puke-filled laundry. Nothing says ‘great husband’ like most of the mess already being cleaned up.

Now get out there, get dirty and enjoy the week. Don’t worry, someone will clean up after you…just ask my kids.