Leading up to the election, I wrote about how I was frustrated by the bullying conversations I was hearing — from members of both parties. I felt like I had to shelter my kids from the political banter because it was mean spirited rather than productive. Of course we had our own family discussions about elections, debates, teamwork, and leadership. We talked about the fact that people disagree, but that’s ok. It’s important to know what you believe and respect others’ beliefs. America is truly special that way.
Now, the day after the election, the discussion I’m hearing is far worse. Democrats thrilled that they beat out the crazies. Republicans worried that their lives as they know it are over. Of course there are a few rational voices speaking of teamwork and unity in the mix. A few.
So now what? What does this election teach us? Our kids?
Well, Big’s been having a hard time lately. (Which means I have too.) We’ve been having to discuss how to talk to friends who aren’t being nice. How to be sure that we’re being nice back (oh, and isn’t that a tough one when you feel like the other person deserves it). And, most importantly, how to accept responsibility for things not going so well, then how to make the choice to act differently.
This is our chance as Americans, voters, and parents to do the same. To listen to each other. And to be able to tell our kids that we acted in a way that should make them proud of us and the example we’re setting.
Democrats, your party won. But not by much. Why did voters who were on your side last time decide that maybe Obama wasn’t right for the country this time? The margin was not narrowed by the outrageously insane right wing voters and politicians you loved to quote. It was those people in the middle. The ones who agree with you about a lot, but not everything. From what I’m hearing, you’re leading the way on the social policy front, but in dire need of some economic reform. Try to listen to them. They might have a point.
Republicans, your party lost. But not by much. Why did those people who were inching your way choose not to take the leap of faith? Or why did the people who say they believe in your party not show up to vote? From what I’m hearing, you’re leading the way on the economic front, but in dire need of some social policy reform. Try to listen to them. They might have a point.
You know what we tell our kids? Gloating is bad sportsmanship. Especially when you won in overtime. With a last-minute field goal.
Having a temper tantrum over losing, well, that’s just as bad.
I would love to see the leaders of our country, our states, and our homes admit that everyone’s made some pretty big mistakes. But instead of spending more time pointing them out, let’s figure out how we can better ourselves and our relationships moving forward. That. That is what will ensure our kids have a better future.
READ: This Mom Asks: Is It Possible To Respectfully Disagree?
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Agreed! Stop with the temper tantrums and let get on with the next 4 years of our lives!
And let’s do it with respect, open mindedness, and an awareness that not everybody agrees, but everybody has a right to be heard.
From what I’m hearing, friends who voted Republican 15 years ago and who voted Democrat this time around did so because of the Democratic party’s strong stance on social issues they support (i.e. these friends support abortion, gay marriage and are concerned about global warming).
While I doubt the Republican party will change their party platform on these issues in order to attract voters (nor should they!), there are definately Americans out there that should be voting Republican but are not. Hispanic Americans (with their Catholic background) should be voting Republican, for example.
I also think that Christian leaders need to take a stronger stance in recommending whom Christians should vote for. I understand that Christians are VERY hesitant to get involved in politics. Christian leaders worry about turning non-Christians or seekers off if they endorse a particular candidate. However, given the political climate we face today, our religious liberties are at stake in these elections. We could very well have our right to worship freely voted away if Christians turn a blind or apathetic eye on the political scene. We should not take for granted this right we have as Americans to worship the way we choose. It’s not like that in much of the world.
Catherine, thank you so much for coming by and sharing your thoughts. I agree that parties and people should stand by their beliefs, but the honest truth is that elections are won in the middle. Both parties need to figure out where their weaknesses are and figure out how to strengthen their approach within their own ideals.
Here’s to our freedom of religion and speech. May they both continue to prosper!
I wrote this LONG reply and lost it. Wah. Basically, a whole big explanation about how the moderates should form a 3rd party, but the way our government is set up it won’t be supported. Therefore, we need to assess the situation differently.
The middle is a far larger group than either the extreme right or the extreme left. We just need to be embraced, listened to. The middle represents many of us.
The question is, who will listen? How? How can the two extremes work together and make the country a happier place?
In the meantime, we all need to be supportive and move toward the success of our country.
Great points, Julie! Thanks so much for adding to a great discussion!
I am so sorry. We, as a nation, are far worse off than the people who voted for free stuff realize.
Twice now, I have totally deleted a line or three. It is going to get far worse before it gets better. I very much doubt I will see prosperity again this side of heaven. And I weep for my children.
Comfortable people are being played for fools. As a nation, what we need is God – but He has been kicked out of our schools. I could go a hundred different directions from here, but it all plays out the same. Unless we as a nation stop worshiping our own comforts and entertainments, and turn our hearts to our Creator, we will continue to become increasingly slaves in our own land.
Until the God given understanding of marriage is restored, families will be broken, and children will be crippled in the process. Wounds can heal, but it takes God to restore.
I am not exactly at my best – but I had hope that people would see how far wrong our nation has gone. And now, I guess I concentrate on just surviving four more years. I will continue to put my hope in God, and pray that eyes will open and people turn.
Roy, I appreciate you voicing your true personal concerns in such a thoughtful manner. You obviously have a very strong viewpoint on politics and I respect that about you. I know many people are feeling the same way you do today and I understand your disappointment. I wish you the best the next four years, and hope that you find happiness with your family and in God in spite of this election.
I do not believe in “if you have nothing nice to say, then don’t say anything at all” when it comes to mature conversations, because – let’s face it – life isn’t all about sunshine and puppy dog kisses and rainbows so let’s be honest and constructive as we move on post-election.
However we need to remember that if there are little ears around (’cause you know they’re ALWAYS listening), then we need to think about what is appropriate for them to comprehend… You know they’re going to emulate what we say… word-for-word! It’s not like we should lie, but – to draw a parallel – the Birds & Bees conversation is going to be very different for a 3-year-old… an 8 year-old… a 14-year-old- and and 18-year-old…
And if all else fails – bottom line – let’s just keep it classy, folks!
Absolutely. I think I wrote this too fast (Pink doesn’t nap so long…). I believe people should speak up — whether in celebration, or disappointment. No doubt the feelings are very strong and very real. I just think that name calling and taunting doesn’t solve any problems. Rather than pointing at others, let’s figure out where our own party needs to improve, and use these next four years to build a stronger nation rather than a nastier party. (That sounded so Janet Jackson, didn’t it?)
I’m ready to put on my headset microphone and bust a move… oh wait, we’re trying to NOT be nasty (pronounced nas-TAY)… DARN! 😉
As usual, I think we’re on the same page!
xoxo
Amy! You nailed it—“not by much” is key on both sides. I do not understand why the gloaters and sore losers don’t get that. Having lived overseas, we Americans tend to look like jacka$$es quite a bit from the perspective of foreigners. And, living here with either as president is a hell of a lot better than communist China and other countries. Seriously, it makes me so mad how people over here forget the bigger picture. And, I’m ashamed by how some people behaved on social media and ashamed that I’m too conflict averse to unfollow them–but I might. As I said earlier, I think there are people in social media who were bullys and in complete denial that they were/are. The mere act of voting should be respected regardless of how you vote and there just wasn’t a lot of that out there yesterday.
I’m right there with you! Thanks for sharing your perspective.
I really appreciate the perspective of “can’t we all just get along” and would absolutely love that reality. Last night, I was elated with the results of the election – I believed that tolerance, love and hope won. Having said that, I woke up with a bit of a sick feeling about how divided we all are – the electorate was literally split in the popular vote. Obama won because of electoral college strategy, not necessarily because of the American people. So, where do we go from here? With a Senate that was stalled by over 200 Filibusters last year, what do we do? Until the people demand more compromise, more tolerance, more open-mindedness from their leaders, I fear things may stay the same. i hope we all rise up and insist that our children deserve better – they deserve leaders who sit in a room and don’t come out until they agree! Thanks for sparking this dialogue, Amy – it’s well needed!
Very well said, Leslie. We need to figure out how we can compromise on solutions without compromising our fundamental beliefs. I do believe it’s possible, but it will take a lot of work. And it needs to start with people on both sides listening to the other to figure out what we have in common, rather than what we don’t.